I have been reflecting a lot on belovedness in my own devotion time and in my poetry. Many of my thoughts have been centered around how I experience my own belovedness and how I express it to myself. The idea being if I do not know and experience my own belovedness how in the world can I help others see their belovedness.
For me belovedness is essentially that feeling of deep belonging and knowing you have a place in this world community we are participants in. It is knowing that what you have to offer is valued, appreciated and noticed - even when you are acting more than human and not at your best. It is the foundation on which I can build every other aspect of my beliefs, hopes, dreams and goals.
Most of my thinking about and experience of belovedness has centered in my own relationship with God and my Christian spirituality practices. Then last night the concept of belovedness and how we foster it in others was broken wide open at my daughter's soccer practice of all places.
My kiddo has been playing recreational soccer since the age of 4 with the same team and coach. Our league has the practice of giving out medals at the end of each season. Now I know there are varying opinions out there about participation awards, but hang with me here.
My daughter looks forward every season to playing the last game of the season and getting her medal. I used to think it was all about the medal for her, that is until I really watched her last night as she received her medal from her coach at the end of her last practice. Her coach gets down on eye level with each girl and has something special to say to them that is individual to who they are as a person, how he has seen them grow in their playing and what he appreciates about them and then gives each one their medal.
Last night I watched my daughter's face when it was her turn, I mean I really watched it, as her coach spoke to her. She was literally alight with a glow, all smiles that reached into her eyes. Her body seemed to want to burst with all that belovedness she was being filled with. And that was when I got it. It is not the medal it self that is important to her. It is everything the medal represents, her place on the team and her relationship with a group of important people in her life. The end of season medal ritual is a place of feeling beloved for her.
Speaking belovedness does not require fancy words or have to be focused only on the religious/spiritual aspect of proclaiming our belovedness in the eyes of God. Yes that is an important part of building the foundation of belovedness - but there is so much more. It is speaking simple everyday words of positivity and building up to those we meet. Expressing belovedness is something that should encompass every part of our daily living in community. It is expressing our thanks to those around us for just being present in our lives and being who they are.
As we enter this season of Thanksgiving, I find myself deeply grateful for loving, trusted adults who are a part of my child's life and of our family's life that know how to speak these words of belovedness to my child. Because she needs to hear them from people other than just her family. I need to hear them spoken to her by others because it reminds me of all the unique things she has to offer that I may not always see because I am Mom and sometimes very frustrated in my parenting.
These examples also remind me that I have a responsibility to speak belovedness in simple everyday ways to others as well and not just those in my own circle of community. Will you join me on a journey this month to spread belovedness and open eyes and hearts to how we can build important healing connection through speaking belovedness? I hope so.
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