Fallow fields, crop rotation and the work of chaplaincy

Photo credit: Karen Nelson

If you have been following me here, you by now know that a little over a month ago I hit a desperate spot spiritually. I was bone dry, beat up and barely muddling through caring for my high need areas of coverage at the hospital. I finally took the courage to step up and ask for what I really needed – to be re-assigned, at least for a while.

It was good to have the break, a time for me to step back and get back to less intense units and doing the work of responding to referrals and other work that was similar to what I did as chaplain just starting out at my place of employment. And until recently that is exactly how I saw this time – a break.

Then I listened to a pod cast by Rob Bell that talked about the practice of Sabbath and the practice of letting a field lay fallow you can listen to it here. This reminded me of something I picked up during my years growing up in a rural area. Farmers will often times rotate the crops that they grow in a field. This allows for a field to not be depleted of important nutrients by having the same crop grown in it over and over again.

As I reflected on this idea of crop rotation and letting ground lay fallow (not have anything growing in it) I began to realize that my request to take time away from one area and be reassigned was not “copping out” but instead implementing a good spiritual practice of care to the field of my soul. By moving away from one area and into another I was given the opportunity to let my soul be nourished with important nutrients of not having every day be filled with the high paced need of critical care, that I was being given space to reconnect with skills of teaching and visioning and dreaming with colleagues that I had not been able to do for so long. I was given the gift of going back to areas and hearing people say I have missed seeing you and getting to reconnect.

Something else happened during this time away, my own spiritual practices changed. I found myself doing a lot of what I call contemplative coloring. I put aside the books I was reading. What at the time felt like doing nothing was actually letting my soul lay fallow and just rest. And how I needed that rest time. That time to not be diving deep, to not be drawing on nutrients that were almost gone. To just let the field of my soul be. And as I have felt drawn back into the books I have in my quiet space at home I am finding what once felt dry and barren in my soul now feels rich and filled once more.

Both this time of spiritual fallowness and the time of assignment rotation has allowed for a safer, healthier response to the emotional work of chaplaincy. I am left reflecting on the metaphor of fallow fields and crop rotation. I am left wondering if there is greater implication for the work of chaplaincy – the idea of after a designated period rotating from one area to another. I wonder if a spiritual practice of rotation would help with the issue of compassion fatigue and burn out that comes in work that is so emotionally heavy.

I know how I would answer these wonderings for myself. Yes, my rotation away helped with my compassion fatigue and close to burn out. I would say that it has given me a fresh passion for my work as chaplain. It is now another self care practice I am adding to my tool box. I am now moving forward with a new intentionality of keeping this practice of balance between a well paced rotation in and out of low and high need areas mixed in with a hefty dose of personal Sabbath time. And with it holding continued hope for years of a healthy journey in my vocation of chaplaincy. 

Photo credit: Karen Nelson