With
November came the annual posts on Facebook of daily posts regarding what people
were thankful for. I love the idea of
giving intentional thanks and encourage people to engage in the practice in whatever
form works for them. This year I felt called
to a slightly different practice of thanksgiving recognition. I did not want to just post words about what
I was thankful for, but instead wanted to practice being fully present to what
I was thankful for. This meant a change
in behavior. Not an easy thing to do, since
I had become tethered to my phone and the Facebook app had become a very bad
habit of distraction. I had to really
work to remember to put the phone down and not worry about recording every
“cool” and meaningful moment for posterity, but rather to just experience the
moment. To help with this, I did the unthinkable;
I took the Facebook app off the phone and gave myself a time limit of no more
than 10 minutes to check in on the necessities. November was hit and miss and it really was not until the start of
Advent I finally felt I was being fully present to the experiences of my life.
The first
time I felt like I was really getting being present was over Thanksgiving spent
at my parent’s house. We all went to a
park so that my daughter could get outside and run off some energy. I LEFT THE PHONE IN THE CAR! And I played, I
had so much fun climbing and running and spinning with C on the equipment and
did not care how silly I looked. Then my
dad and I took a walk. While walking and
talking a huge flock of geese took off no more than 20 feet in front of
us. I marveled at getting to watch the aerial
dance of each goose finding his or her place in the formation. I was fully
present to the wonder of this and feel I experienced more of God’s creation in
that moment than I did for months previously.
I felt more
alive and at peace than I had for a while, so I extended the practice through
Advent. I chose carefully what I did and did not want to participate in. I found ways to simplify the crazy rush of
the Christmas season. I spent time in
deep prayer and devotion and reflective writing. On my day off I took walks;
nice long, cold morning walks. I reveled in the simple beauty that I saw on the
way. Frost on brown plants, the nub of a
pinecone remnant in a pine tree, a lone marigold hanging on, all were noticed
in new, fresh ways. I gave myself
permission to slow down and reprioritize the “to do” list. I gave myself permission to write different
and more creative pieces for Chaplainhood. I gave myself permission to step back a bit
and care for myself.
The result
is my soul has begun to bloom again and find energy. I am really noticing the little things around
me that I previously would miss. I feel
happier and more connected to my family. I am finding time to do things for myself. And I am beginning to feel creative once
more. I am becoming more patient and less cranky (my daughter really
appreciates this one.)
As I
prepare to enter a New Year, I am doing something different once more. I am actually making some New Year’s
resolutions. I resolve to continue to
put the phone and technology down and continue being fully present to my family
and myself. I am going to continue to
work on keeping a slower pace. And I am
going to give myself permission to realize that I will not keep any of these on
a regular basis and will need to take remedial action to regain what I learned
in the last two months. I am hopeful that
because the resolutions are not really new, but rather an extension of current
practices that this year I might actually be successful in keeping these.
As we move
into the preparing for a new year, what moments of grace are you being led to
extend to yourself as 2016 starts? How might you find a practice to help you
regain what ever it is that you may have lost touch with?
May you find deep blessing as we journey together into 2016.
