Ending and Beginning Dances

Photo Credit: CJ Freeman

God you created endings and beginnings.
Times to say goodbye to what is
and
Times to say hello to new adventures.

It is a holy dance
this invitation to
ending and beginning.

Help me to pause the revelry
long enough to hear clearly
that which you are calling me
to let go of.

Help me to still the excited twirling
into the new
long enough to see clearly
the path ahead that you are
calling me to.

Help me to not tire of this dance
of ending and beginning.
For this dance is not one that happens
for a moment in time at the end of a year,
but instead is one life calls us to engage in
for our life time.

God, help me to embrace this dance of
ending and beginning.
Letting it whirl and twirl me into the
fullness of life that you have to offer me.

AMEN.

God's Broader View

God how arrogant have we been to believe that
You are only working in the world
through our narrow view of our
personal beliefs.

You are so much bigger than that.
Yes, your son Jesus is so very important.
As is the message of salvation that Jesus brings.

But we must remember
that Your view is so
much longer and broader
than ours.

You have been
working and weaving in the world
since it began.

Help me to remember how
You work in great
mysterious and connective ways.

AMEN

You Came as a Child

God, You came as a child.
Why a child?
Is it their innocence?
Their openness?
Is it because of how
we are more open to a baby,
more forgiving of a child.

Did you come as a child
because that was the only way
we would open ourselves
to the
awe, wonder and mystery
of You making Yourself
fully present on earth?

Did you come as a child
because that was the only way we,
with our
cynical, hardened hearts
would open to the fullness
of Your love for us,
your beloved children.

God You came as a child
and our hearts are more
whole because of
You come to earth.

Advent Mystery

God you are everywhere,
even when I may not see You
or understand how You are working.

In my humanness,
I seek to explain
or have an explanation
of everything.

But with You
not everything is
fathomable.

Help me lean into
Your mystery.
Into the mystery of this season.
Into the blessing of knowing.
Into the knowing You are here, working.

And let this all be enough.

AMEN

Proclaim

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What message are you proclaiming this season?  How can your proclamations help others hear God’s message of belovedness?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Advent Light

God you are the Light of the World.
Your Son is the living light and word.

It seems so dark,
the world right now.

But it seems dark
because I lose my focus
looking only to the world.

Re-orient me God.
Change my focus
back to Your light.

Because in You
there is always light and hope.

Blankets of Slow

Blankets of white
covering the earth.

Still,
Peaceful,
Beautiful.

This is your gift of
Slow to the earth.

Reminding us it
does not always have
to be
go and do.

Blankets of white
covering the earth.

Your invitation to us
to

Be still and know
that You
Are God.

AMEN

Advent Love

God,

You came to earth so that
You and I might be one.

You came to earth so that
Your Kingdom would be
on earth as it is in heaven.

How patient You must be
to live here with us,
in the messes we have created.

O how much You must love us.

Thank you.

AMEN.

Stop, Wait, Watch, Breath

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

Stop, Wait, Watch, Breath.   How do you need to practice these things this season?  Where in your life to you need to be intentional about practicing these things this Advent/Christmas season?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Advent Welcome

Advent has come and with it an abundance of reflection on my part.  Join me this season as I share an extra post each Sunday of Advent.  It is my hope that these posts will help us all to slow down, refocus and re-member to the story of hope, peace, joy and love that comes in the story of Advent and Christmas.


It is so easy
in this season of busy,
to rush in
do this
plan that.

God help me to pause.
To start this season
slow,
silent,
listening.

Help me to remember to
invite you into my
doing,
planning,
being
of the season.

Help me to remember
to not only
prepare my plans,

But to first prepare
my heart.

Ready to focus on this
season of welcome,

Welcoming your Son
Christ Jesus
once again.

AMEN

Expression of Thanksgiving

God Your creation

shines the depth of
Your love for me.

It is your love
of my most imperfect self
that gives me pause
of deepest thanks.

My heart is filled
to overflowing with
the grace and mercy
You extend to me
Your child.

How do I express
my thankfulness in ways
that honor You?

May my extension of Your
Love, Grace, and Mercy
to all who I encounter
be an acceptable expression
 of my thanks.

AMEN

Bloom

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What is opening up in you right now?  How do you need to bloom?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Filled with Belovedness

Thank you God for loving me
as I am.

For helping my soul to know
my belovedness.

For infusing in me the knowledge
of Your Divine Love.

It is because of this knowledge
that I am able to be Your
hands and feet in the world.

It is Your love of me
and my knowledge of
my belovedness
that sustains me in the challenging days.

It is Your love of me
and my knowledge of
my belovedness
that sustains me when you
send me where I do not feel
I have the strength to go.

It is Your love of me
that says
I send you because you
know my belovedness and are ready
to share that here where it is needed most.

Fill me once again God with
Your belovedness of me,
for I poured it all out once again.

AMEN

Grow Creatively Where You Are Planted

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

How can you grow right where you are? How might you need to look creatively to grow where you are?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Open Eyes, Open Heart

God,
You touch all of creation.

You are never far away.

It is my own lack of focus
that takes you out of view.

Clear my focus, God.

Open my eyes to the
wonders of Your nearness.

May this opening of eyes
also open my heart.
That I may be your vessel,
open to letting you work
through me.

AMEN.

Reflected

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What words are creatively being reflected in your life? How are you creatively reflecting God in unexpected places?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Fall Reflecting

Leaves of liquid gold and fire red
hang with tenacity
from quickly emptying branches
waiting until it is their turn to
gracefully let go and fall.

I look to the trees
and see a time of winding down,
of slowing to deep rest.

I hear God's gentle call
to let go of the busy
to let go of the need
to do more,
to be more.

I hear God's voice reminding me
that I to need seasons of
letting go,
seasons of deep rest.

Fall is my circle of life reminder
to let go,
to rest.

It is my season of
already and not yet.

It is my winding down
to simple breath
and being.

It is my Holy and wholly season.
Where I catch my breath
and find my
already and not yet.

Thanks be to God.
AMEN.

Shelter

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

This looks like the perfect shelter for something tiny.  Are there ways you may feel tiny in this world? Where do you find shelter? How does the shelter help you feel cared for?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

My Prayer

Peace, Hope, Love, Joy

Lord help me infuse all of these into my life.

May I feel Peace of Spirit,
so I may be a vessel of Peace.

May I feel Hope of Spirit,
so I may be a vessel of Hope.

May I feel Love of Spirit,
so I may be an expression of God's Love.

May I feel Joy of Spirit,
So I may be a vessel of Joy
reminding a weary world of all
that is still good and of you God.

AMEN.

What do you see?

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What does this look like to you?  How does that reflect what you are in need of today? What your soul is in need of today?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Worn Out

As I walked through my week I kept hearing from people just how busy fall seems to be and that so many of us seem to already be struggling to find the energy to keep going. If you are like me and need time alone and away from people to recharge, this season of busy can be draining not only physically but emotionally and spiritually as well. So for all of us who seem to have schedules that are overburdened with activities and things demanding our time this poem's for you.  Take a breath, know you are not alone and that together with God we will find our way to a slower pace again.

WORN OUT

Dried up,
Barren,
Nothing left,
is how I feel.

The rat race pace of the week
greedily,
ravenously
consuming what ever energy I have left.

I go through the motions of my
quiet devotion time.
But it is not the same
as the chaos
pounds my soul.

I crave time away from
ALL of humanity.
Blessed quiet and aloneness.
Just me and you God.

But the schedule screams for attention.
Quiet and aloneness seem an
Eternity away.

And still I know you are here
in the middle of my
cranky,
exhausted chaos.
You are here loving me
even as I show the worst side
of myself.

You call to me,
telling me to lean closer.
Reminding me that you
will give me strength
to make it to the end of this chaos.

You remind me of the promise
that you will provide.
That the blessed quiet and aloneness
that feeds me
will be there.

Thanks be to YOU God.
AMEN.

Promise after the Storm

Wind blows,
Rain falls,
Bringing with it the storms.

The storm is loud,
wild,
fearsome and scary.

But I do not seek to
be focused on the storm.

Instead I look towards
the promise of hope
that comes in the rainbow.

I wait for the
fresh, washed clean scent
that comes when the storm clears.

I know that after the storm
is the promise of renewal.

For even the earth
can not live with out water
to nourish it.

Thus I can not live
with out Your Holy Breath
and life giving water.

Grow Where You Are

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

This vine uses what ever was handy to climb up and grow.  How might you climb and grow where you are right now?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Lost and Found

Monday I took my daughter to see the movie "Christopher Robin." It is an excellent movie, I recommend you see it. As I was watching the movie, I realized that this is a movie for adults.  Not because of content inappropriate for young eyes and ears, but because as busy, super focused adults we need the message Christopher Robin learns. I have spent the last couple of days thinking about how I might begin to remember for myself who I was as a child. I have been contemplating what does it really mean to play, not just the way I may play as an adult, but child like, innocent, creative play.  You know the kind that you can in no way take yourself too seriously to engage in. Well, I think I shall just stop the reflective questions right here, because I do not want to ruin the movie for you.  Instead I will leave you with the words of this poem inspired by the message I took from the movie.




Lost and Found
Somewhere along the way
I lost myself.

I let the busy of life,
the pressure to succeed,
the expectations of others
take over.

In doing so I forgot the important things:
     Play
     Silence
     Compassion
     Connection
     Being true to myself.

Memories of a self long forgotten
tapped me on the shoulder,
saying
Remember us?
Remember you?

And in the moment
my true self is once again
remembered.

I remembered the happiness
that is found in the
honoring of who you truly are.

And I stopped to
    Re-imagine myself
    Let go of that which is not me.

I took a deep breath
Stepped onto a new path
to begin to find myself again.

This time moving into the
life journey
more fully me
than I have ever been before.

Cocooning time

After a while of deeply engaging my reflective writing practice I find that I enter a season of needing to be still, to give my words a chance to rest. It becomes a time for me to enter into a cycle of listening and practicing being fully present to my little corner of the world with out constantly being "on the look out" for the next great poetic topic. It is a time for me to enter my own little cocoon of everyday life letting the practice of living through just being nourish and nudge me to my next place of contemplative focus.

Another season of needing to rest and listen has entered into my life.  It is time to honor that need and let Chaplainhood enter it's cocoon so to speak, waiting on the transformative beauty that comes. 

In this time of Holy pause may you:

• remember to pause each day to look up, breath deep and wonder
• see the good work of God going on all around you
• connect to the great Hope that is promised in God's beloved presence with you.

Until we pause and play here again......

Busy Bees

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

How might this busy bee help you reflect on the busyness in your own life? Is it busy that works for the good of all, like this little pollinator? Or is it busy for the sake of busy? Something else?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

As Sure As...

As sure as the sun rises,
You are with me God.

As sure as the wind blows,
You God, are giving Holy breath to my soul.

As sure as the summer heat flames,
You God are fanning the flame of my
desire to spend more time in Your presence.

As sure as the rains will come,
You God direct me to Your words
written by inspired people.
Words to nourish and refresh my spirit.

As sure as I draw breath every day,
You God will journey with me.
And I will come to know you even more.

AMEN.

Damaged or Beautiful?

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What is your perspective - are these leaves damaged or beautiful? How does your perspective impact how you see God working? How does your perspective impact how you reflect God in your own everyday life?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Clouds

White cotton
dropped across a
powder blue canvas.

Drifting gracefully
carried on gentle
unseen currents
of God's breath.

Gazing up,
a moment of pause.
In quiet noiselessness
I hear your invitation to play.

God you whisper
"tell me what you see in the clouds."

My imagination opens up.
The images I see
reflections of what is
deep in my heart.

I speak to God
words of my joy
words of my pain.
Allowing cloud images to
draw forth
the words that have
needed to pour out
of me for so long.

My heart lightens
images seen become
more playful.
And we play.
God tossing clouds.
Me sharing my imagination.

Sunset comes and with it
a call to bodily rest.
Clouds float together a puffy
blanket of purple orange.

A blanket of love
drawn over us as
God tucks us in for sleep.
Waiting for us to wake again
and respond to God's calling
"Come spend time with me,
just as you are."

Hope's Labyrinth

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

Hope's Labyrinth. Our families healing ritual as we built it seven years ago. Hope's marker of Hope's existence in the world. My quiet space.

What are your markers of remembrance?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

My Companion Grief

A Note about this week's posts:
This week marks the 8 year anniversary of the loss of my second pregnancy and with that the death of the child that we named Hope.  All grief is a perpetual journey with reminders of the person showing up at unexpected times, even years later.  Parents often describe the death of a child as a forever grief as they often grieve more accutely at what would have been important milestones and anniversaries of births and deaths.

This week holds two anniversaries for me.  Today marks the day we found out that Hope would not live to birth.  Thursday, July 12th marks the day of Hope's death. (I tell more of our story in posts here.) 8 years may seem like a long time for some, however for me it often still seems like just yesterday.

I realized that my postings this week either fell on or one day before these two anniversary dates.  It felt like a nudge to me to take the time this year to once again mark Hope's existence and my grief journey.  Thank you for taking a moment to come along side as I once again grieve and remember.


My Companion Grief

I stuff my days full of "to do's"
In hope that these next days and weeks
will speed by.
In hope that I won't have the time to
notice my heart remembering
it's being ripped in half eight years ago.

But grief, my friend,
you do not work that way.
You are strong.
You push up past all
the busy barriers I try to put up.

To you it does not matter
if it has been
one day
one year
one decade.

You return to visit time and again.
A reminder that life is not a given.
That life requires periods of letting go
and figuring out how to move forward
when it feels like your world has stopped.

Grief, we have journeyed
hand in hand
for eight years now.
You have taught me much:
~that I am stronger than I realize
~that you are a universal connecting point
~that my ability to grieve is in direct relation
to my capacity to love.

Today you tap my shoulder once again
reminding me of your presence
reminding me of another year of anniversaries
and the need to remember deeply TODAY.

I take your hand and let you
gently guide me through this day
and the days to come this week,
knowing that tomorrow will come.

With the hope of sunrise
comes the hope of once more
surviving the deep feelings
and finding my battered heart
just a bit more healed.

Hidden

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

Where might you find hidden glimpses of God in the every day around you?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Gifts from a Tree

I stand and look up
under your leafy boughs
feeling the safety of your
enveloping green blanket
shading me.

I understand now why
the Robin and Cardinal
choose your branches.
Why the rabbit chooses
the base of your trunk.
To rest.

Your branches
dance in the wind.

The leaves rustle
a song as the wind
plays along their
green silkiness.

As we sit together
my soul's pace slows.
Peace is restored.
I am infused with the
wonder of God's
mysterious wisdom in
creating you and your
unique purpose.

So I look up into
your leafy boughs
and find rest for my soul
and a reminder of my
belovedness as a
creation of God also.

And then I just breathe.

Snow Layers - Life Layers

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

The weight of the snow compacts into beautiful layers, a pattern that tells the story of winter.  How is the presence of God be helping to create beautiful layers in you that tells your unique story?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Water and Spirit

Water strong and deep,
the kind that is able to
fall in a gentle rain
to nourish a dry thirsty earth.

Water strong and deep,
the kind that has the power
to rage and tumble over rocks
and make rapids.

Water strong and deep,
the kind that is wild
breaking it's banks
refusing to be reigned in.

Spirit
like water
falls in a gentle nourishing cascade.

Spirit
like water
flows powerfully
moving us to action.

Spirit
like water
refuses to be held in boundaries.

Spirit
that guides my steps
to be Your hands and feet God.

Spirit that opens me up when
I need to return to the
water of Your presence God.
The well of renewal in Your word.

So that I can once again
be like nourishing, renewing water
to those that cross my path.

AMEN.

Soaring

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

How or where in your life do you need the freedom to soar? What might help you attain that?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.

Vulnerable

Vulnerable
That's what you ask me to be.
Willing to open myself
up to you completely God.

You sit quietly beside me
as I lay bare my heart.
Pour out all that I have bottled up inside
trying to be strong.

In you God,
I do not have to be strong
because You are my strength.

But I can only find Your strength
if I am willing to let go
of my desires
to stay firmly in control.

And instead
let go of my need
to protect myself.
Putting trust in You to be my protection.

In my vulnerability in Your presence
I then can find a new strength
that will accompany me
as I enter back into living
the life laid before me.

Knowing this space
of vulnerable strength
in Your quiet presence
is waiting for me
the next time I need re-filling.

Unexpected Reflections

I invite you to pause for a moment and take some time for some contemplative play.

Start by letting this image fill your mind as you focus on your breath and letting yourself slow down into this time and this space.  Letting your breath and this picture be all that you attend to right now.

What unexpected places might you find reflected messages of God's love and grace to you?  How might you reflect these same messages in unexpected ways to others?

Consider these questions also:

What do you see?
What colors stand out to you? Why?
What does your imagination do with this picture?
What words come to mind?
What favorite quotes from your favorite spiritual literature come to mind?


I invite you to join in conversation with me in the comments below what has come of your contemplative play time today.